You ended your relationship with the love of your life, however now you regret it. It is fairly common for couples to reacquaint, once they have spent time apart from one another, so have a little faith. Before you try to get your ex boyfriend back though, make sure you consider the reasons for your break up. This will help you avoid making the same mistakes at the second time of asking.
Prior to Getting in Touch With your ex, Consider These two Issues
Firstly, are you really still in love with him, or do you just want someone to cuddle up to on a cold evening? Do not set the wheels in motion, unless you are sure you still want him. Secondly, did you have a positive bond with him previously? It is far simpler to recollect all the nice characteristics about a man, than to recall the negative things — such as how you argued constantly, or how lazy he was. Honestly evaluate your previous relationship, so you don’t end up in another destructive situation.
Don’t Rush Things
Finishing a relationship can be traumatic, so it is wise to avoid contacting your ex before you attempt to make amends. You both have to come to terms with the short-term pain of the failed relationship, and consider what you want from life. Of course, you don’t have to ignore him completely, if you attend the same college or have the same friends. However, don’t socialize with him or call him for a while, until you have properly healed and gathered your thoughts.
If you are contacted by your ex a lot, tell him that you want some temporary breathing space, so he doesn’t assume that you have disowned him. If the man in your life is somewhat insecure or shy, this is particularly important. Remember, he might require some time to appreciate how much he loves you as well.
Learn to Love Yourself
Make the most of this ‘you time’ to develop your self-esteem and redefine your goals. The more self-confident you are, the more likely you are to enjoy a long, prosperous relationship. If you experience anxiety or depression, seek assistance from a mental health counselor. You might be amazed by the difference modern treatments can have on your mindset.
On a daily basis, tell yourself how strong and talented you are. Rejoice in everything you have achieved, in all areas of your life. If you find it difficult to acknowledge your own positive points, speak to your relatives and friends. They will be able to tell you what your best characteristics are. Always keep a sense of perspective and count your blessings. Meditation can reduce your stress levels and allow you to live each day to its’ fullest.
Prior to Extending an Olive Branch, do This
Determine his relationship status. If this is not listed online, look at his photos on Facebook to see if he has any snaps of himself with girls in suggestive poses. Alternatively, you can find this out by stealth by asking him, via email or Facebook message, about the people you both know. Then, you can turn this into a discussion about his love life in general. This way, any potential love rivals will become apparent.
Handling Your Reunion Date
If everything has gone smoothly up till now, arrange a casual date – like meeting for a cappuccino. It is informal, so you are not going to risk embarrassment if he does not have romantic feelings for you anymore. Also, you could arrange a meet up in the pub that you used to drink at, or at your preferred Indian restaurant from way back when. The familiar surroundings will bring back good past memories.
On your date, subtly remind your ex about the exciting, sexy or enjoyable times you shared — such as the wonderful holiday you had, or your first meeting. This will reignite the emotions you had then. Try to make light physical contact, by brushing your knees against his beneath the table. Note whether he seems receptive to this.
Of course, when trying to get your ex-boyfriend back, there is a fair chance that it might not work out. And, even if you get back together initially, there is no guarantee that the relationship will last long term. Be mentally prepared for this ahead of time, so you don’t get badly hurt again.